A friend posted a quote yesterday by Hans F. Hansen, “People
Inspire You or Drain You. Pick Them
Wisely.” I responded, “Sometimes both
are the person in the mirror,” which prompted a private conversation about why
I said that, perhaps strange, thing.
Here’s what I was thinking.
I think it's important to acknowledge self-talk. We
can inspire ourselves or we can drain ourselves. We need others, but we need
ourselves. I had a really hard week last week. My self-talk and attitude
affected the way I saw the world. I drained my ‘self.’ I didn't find
inspiration is who I was or how I was. And through it all, I learned not only a
lot about myself and how I react, but how my internal being can affect it
all. As a woman, I can
call it PMS--that hormonal, beat-up-the-world time that sometimes makes me
struggle to be human.
Also, times like that help me
learn to surround my ‘self’ with people who will lift me out, inspire and
motivate me to do and be better. Hanging out with those who will perpetuate the
pity party is not going to be helpful. I
reached out to a few of those people who would, could and did help me out of my
funk and I am much more the ‘me’ I want to see in the mirror.
We need each other.
Today, when I continue my
reflection, I think about how we each can inspire or drain the people around
us, so it isn’t just about picking people wisely, it’s about behaving wisely,
too. It is also about knowing the people
with whom we surround ourselves and accepting that each of us can (and most
likely will) be both ‘draining’ and ‘inspiring’ to most of our family and
friends as some point or another in life.
How we react to a difficult moment, a ‘draining’ moment, in someone’s
life does not mean they are always going to ‘drain’ – if we know them well, we
know that we are all a combination of behaviors and emotions.
I was reading about ‘promises’
this week. These covenants we make with
one another and with our communities (family, friends, faith communities, civic
organizations) are ways to define our relationships with others. When we understand that promises can be made,
changed, developed or broken, we may want to be reminded that God’s covenant
with the people is binding. God’s promises
are our models for behavior. Whether we are ‘draining’ or ‘inspiring,’ God has promised to love us.
Dear Heavenly One, Your presence
with me in draining times is one of the most stable sources of inspiration and
love. Help me to be more accepting of
myself and of others when the clouds of despair, depression, frustration and
helplessness shade the inspirational, loving, growing people we more truly
are. Amen.