Nourishment For The Journey: Sermon 3/10/2019

I couldn’t fall asleep the other night. It wasn’t because I wasn’t tired. I was. I was tired enough to get into bed about an hour earlier than usual, but I just couldn’t fall asleep.

I have little habits that help me to relax, but sometimes, they just don’t work. And when that happens, my mind starts to race. After laying there for over an hour, tossing and turning, I finally got up. I realized I was hungry. While I was toasting an English Muffin, I remembered a song that fit what I was experiencing.

Craig Minowa, of Cloud Cult, captured it in his song, Room Full of People in Your Head. These are the lyrics:

Cloud Cult - Room Full of People in Your Head –

There's a room full of people in your head, in your head.
Yeah, there's a room full of people in your head, in your head.
And every single one of them claims your name.
You lost control to the mood, my friend.
Whattcha gonna do if you lose it again?

"I'm sorry." Again. "I'm sorry." Again. "I'm sorry."
In the center stands Ego- looking for attention.
And over there's Self Pity, always crying, "Poor, poor me!"
Lock up the liquor, or they're gonna get juiced.
I've got each of these in me.

There's a fight, there's a fight at the party in your head.
Yeah, there's a fight for control at the party in your head.
I don't even know who's at the wheel.
Who wants to play? "Give it to me!"
Who wants to play? "Give it to me!"
"I'm sorry." Again. "I'm sorry." Again. "I'm sorry."

Part of me is the Hang Man, looking for a scape-goat.
And part of me is the victim, always crying, "Why you pickin' on me?"
Lock up the gun cabinet, or it's gonna get messy.
I've got each of these in me.

You've gotta follow the voice you wanna follow,
gotta kill off the thoughts that funk up your diddy-diddy.
"You'd be surprised to find how much was in your mind."
Cuz there's a room full of people in your head, in your head.
And they will fight for control of your head, of your head.
"You'd be surprised to find how much was in your mind."

There's Mr. Self Conscious, carrying too much baggage.
and over there's the Chameleon, always crying, "Who you want me to be?"
Let's end the charade. This game is over.
I've got each of these in me.*

Oh, the voices in our heads that wrestle together, vying for attention, distracting, causing doubt, wreak havoc on the psyche. The voices can be so loud. Voices that dig up memories of mistakes or mishaps. Voices that berate and beat up. Or that shout, “You aren’t enough!”

And when I’m tired and want to sleep, sometimes, these are the voices that test me. The voices that cause me to doubt or wonder or question my behavior or actions. Or that distort some reality, turning it into something vastly different than the truth.

I know the truth. I know that these voices infiltrate my head when I’m at my weakest. They test my resolve. Sometimes they are there when I feel confident and comfortable. Either way, they can impact me so that I question who I am and what I am doing for God.

Maybe that’s not always a bad thing. Perhaps I need to spend some quiet time discerning just those questions so that I can know what I need to work on.

Other times, it may be better to respond like the young people do today and say, “Not today, Satan.” You are not going to test me today.

In his book, Provoking the Gospel of Luke, Richard Swanson, wrote about the role of the devil. But before he could delve into today’s Gospel, Swanson had to go back into the Older Testament for some background. He turned to the beginning of the book of Job, where Satan is described as one of the sons of God, a heavenly being, described as the accuser, who came and presented himself before the Lord (Job 1:6).

Swanson says Satan is not who we think he is. Satan is not some man dressed in red with horns and a tail and a pitchfork sent to disrupt humans. Satan is not the antithesis of God. Satan is not a god, not an equal to God. Actually, Satan isn’t even a name. It is more of a job title. In Job, he is described as “the satan,” “the accuser.”

Richard Swanson likes to think of the satan more as a housing inspector: as, he wrote: “the person appointed by God to inspect the structure of creation and of human lives. If there is shoddy construction, it is his job to point it out. … It is his job to accuse, test, challenge, and determine whether things are as solid as they seem (pg.115).”

In other words, the satan plays and important part in this story. His role is to test Jesus in ways that show that Jesus is ready to do all that he was sent to earth to do. His job in the desert was to make sure that everything is copesetic—that Jesus has all the knowledge and foundation needed to be able to withstand all the trials and temptations and tests that are to come.

In those forty days in the desert, Jesus was tested and tempted and tried, and he proved that he trusted God to provide everything he would need.

Jesus could do this because Jesus is Jesus. He knew who he was and Who sent him into the world to bring the world back into right relationship with God.

To do this, Jesus needed to spend time alone with God on a regular basis. We read these stories of Jesus in the wilderness. This one came right after Jesus was baptized and right before Jesus goes into his hometown and preaches for the first time. Two stories we learned about in the past couple of months.

The lectionary skipped over these verses between, saving them for this first Sunday in Lent, using them to help us understand that as Jesus Followers we, too, need to find quiet time with God to help us understand our role in God’s creation. Sometimes we use it to understand that as people of faith we will be tempted and tried and tested throughout our lives. We will be challenged to live in ways that reflect our belief. We need to be able to withstand the testing, as Jesus did.

But this is not our story. These are not our tests. The tests we heard today are not tests for ordinary humans. These are tests that could only be given to Jesus because only Jesus could respond with such faithfulness to God. We can only offer a fraction of such faith.

Yet we have faith. Deep in our minds, hearts and souls, we trust that God will provide sustenance, that God will guide us, and that God will continually love us. Comically, our humanity leads us to believe we have some control over all these things. And there are times, like those wee hours of the morning, when the voices in our heads create doubt that we are good enough to deserve God’s love.

That’s when any of us might need to be reminded that we were created in the image of God and that we are loved.

Take a moment and pair up. Move if you need to. Look into each other’s eyes. One at a time say to each other, “You are a beloved child of God. You are loved.”

Let us pray. Dear Jesus, this story reminds us that you are Jesus, God’s son, able to withstand the harshest of tests because of your dedication to your Father. Help us, especially when we are tested, when we are tempted, to stand firm—enough—in our faith to trust that God is with us. When the voices in our heads and the voices on the street tell us that we are not enough for you, suggesting that you have left us behind, be our reminder, that you are Emmanuel—God with us. When our faith falters guide us into scripture, lead us into meditation, bring us to prayer, for You are our example of faithfulness. You are the Way of Love. Amen.

(Want to hear it? go to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AIXw7eerYL4)

Note: in the sermon, I did not recite all of the lyrics