I’ve
given some more thought to love letters.
And love. And communication. How we communicate our love to one another,
no matter the relationship, is key to how well relationships develop. I’m working with a group, preparing for a
presentation next week and we are taking this topic to our class. The Biblical texts take us back to Genesis
11:1, 6-9, and the story of
Babel. It is an explanation for the
numerous languages that are developed and the purpose—that people were
forgetting God. Later, in Acts
2:1-8, 11, we find the story of the Holy Spirit resting upon the people
and giving them the ability to speak and understand a variety of languages so
that the God’s message would be further sent into the world.
I had always looked at these texts as literal languages. I suppose because the Scripture lists languages,
but as many understand, the Bible is often an allegory and is not always to be
taken literally. When I opened up my
creative mind (and remembered that the business we own is about communication)
I became aware that we each bring unique ideas to communication. We have needs and wants and desires as to how
we want to be communicated with—not to.
While most of the research we found is geared to intimate relationships
(spouses and children), we decided that it reaches further out into our
circles. How we react to communication
is often affected by the way we wish to be communicated with.
It is Love Language (http://personalitycafe.com/articles/112444-five-love-languages-explained.html). And yes, we
all have it. We all need to feel that
our needs can be met by the people around us—whether for a moment or a
lifetime. Of course, as receivers we
cannot expect that the world will revolve around our needs, but we can expect
to hear kindness and respect most of the time.
As the one speaking, we have the responsibility to speak with kindness
and respect—all of the time. But we have
power, each of us. If we understand that
the relationships we are a part of require some massaging of the language to be
more fully understood, more willingly accepted, then we are ahead of the
game.
So how do we communicate in loving ways? For many people, words are not even the
issue! You can tell me you love me
through gifts, through acts of service, through touch, through giving time or
with words of affirmation! What becomes
difficult is knowing which language is the priority at the moment, because,
really, don’t we all want all of these at one time or another?
Yesterday I wrote a love letter. It prompted more conversation about love,
memories, commitment, faith in one another and the pure enjoyment of seeing
words handwritten on stationery. We’ve
missed that, especially in this world of computer generated communication. It’s easy to send an email or a text. These become instant messages. A love letter, well, that takes a different
mindset. It takes a concentrated effort
to give up time doing something else to express emotions through swirls and
dots, through inserted hearts and smiley faces, with exclamation points and
lipstick kisses.
And that letter fulfilled all of the Love Languages: Time, Gift, Touch, Affirmation and even
Service, for both of us.